Isn't there any other way than self forgiveness?: Day 16

Why can't I live my life without self forgiveness?
What happens if I try to do all of this without it?
Forgiving my self won't change any thing.
Forgiveness won't help me change even after all the statements, so why do it?
I just distract my self with each statement from the actions I may have taken sooner if I just let the consequences build up.
Preparing my self for a moment of action with forgiveness makes it easier for me to not change my actions because I remember that I forgave it ahead of time/before facing that moment.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to make forgiveness impossible through defining it as making exceptions, making excuses, dragging things out, and justifying inaction and inability.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to feel forgiveness is a way out and that is a double entendre, fine-line meaning that I have let my self cross many times.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to have disguised the ultimate escape/trap from my responsibility within the name/word/image of a tool that has the potential to help free me for life.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to leave this point unaddressed where my living understanding of self forgiveness misleads me to making the mistakes again and again instead of correcting them.. misleads me to unnecessarily repeating something as my statements lessen my awareness of my responsibility to correct my self and discover the change in my actions.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to make self forgiveness impossible to use in my life because, as I can see within me, it is thoroughly packed and clouded with terrible judgment and choices when and as it is applied to my self.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to forgive my self the way I have forgiven my self.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to have any hope in forgiveness that it will work as long as these definitions still exist in my self as forgiveness - because as long as these definitions come back to life within me.. the self forgiveness will have the reverse effect.. and applying the reverse to my self is harsh to live with.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to think and believe I have no conditions within forgiving my self, that I am applying it the correct way, which is in the direction of correcting my self in my life.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to protect my self definition within self forgiveness where I have all sorts of beliefs, ideas, emotions and feelings, reactions, misunderstandings, unconsciousness, images, and more.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to be living in this nightmare on earth and in my mind where self forgiveness is rejected and even once found has to be investigated thoroughly because it is practically booby trapped with programming that would never accept and allow the application of it without resistances, reactions, and conflict.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to be so separated and mislead when it comes to this aspect of my self, this expression of my self, this tool of my self... that I barely grasp the way forward with it, and only with great amounts of support and sharing by others have I been able to grasp this..

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to miss the point that my experience of my self, that who I am in facing this word and the application of this word is a reflection of how unforgiving humanity is.. how hard it may be for this world to come around to forgiving itself.. and that who I am within applying self forgiveness makes a difference for this world, for others, to begin their journey of forgiving themselves - If I can change my relationship to self forgiveness, it will help the world change.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to not see how inextricable self forgiveness is to life and how a world without it looks like the world we are already in.. one that will only get worse.. and how this questioning of a life lived in self forgiveness as impossible is really just a reflection of who I am.. why do I want to live without forgiveness?

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to fear the finality, the absoluteness, and the certainty I am able to see within self forgiveness - that it is already a functional element of life working in many ways.. and that just because the word/name is an interesting or fascinating choice that I want to question the peculiar nature of.. does not mean that it has not already had a specific, effective place in existence. Having the name of self forgiveness, application of it in specific statements, and the particular insights from participation just opens up the world I never knew could exist.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to be stuck on my inability to see through the eyes of self forgiveness into my self in action, where I feel the clearing out of my self within self forgiveness has also cleared out any potential corrective actions I was prepared and committed to taking - which brings into question why was I going to act in the first place and from where was it that self forgiveness wiped it out?

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to feel incapacitated by self forgiveness and blinded because I no longer maintain a vision of my plan to act and lose touch with my sense of the situation.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to define forgiveness as the reason why I cannot get something done or why I didn't do something sooner.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to misplace my self or displace my self within my application of self forgiveness to where it is the only word I am trying to live and therefore constantly failing and falling because I cannot seem to escape this trap I created in/as the definition/self definition of forgiveness/self forgiveness.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to feel like self forgiveness is safety, that when I applying it I am saved and I don't need to worry about anything else as long as I am applying it - not to say that I should worry because self forgiveness won't save me.. but that I have a relationship with my self in forgiveness that must be corrected because my living of forgiveness as self is a rigged pitfall packed with things to be aware of - just as many other things in this also are.

I forgive my self for accepting and allowing my self to think and believe that what I am doing within self forgiveness is unquestionably best for me and that it couldn't use some serious investigation and written exploration from time to time.

When and as I forgive my self for accepting and allowing, I stop and I breathe.

I commit my self to step out of my pretenses about my application of my self within self forgiveness where I have many points within my self forgiveness to explore, and to balance my self in understanding that this I have not arrived at a point within my self to feel so safe and deeply trusting about.

I commit my self to work out my awareness within self forgiveness and bring forth these points within me that I see in applying self forgiveness, so that I am working with things inside me openly to grow and become confident.

I commit my self to finding a balancing point within the application of my self, where self forgiveness isn't overriding everything to the point I diminish my self in action because my living of self forgiveness is polluted in definition which becomes pollution in my life.

I commit my self to being serious about remaining in touch with my self commitments, actions, and changes.. and moving closer to those points and becoming more equidistant and in equilibrium with self forgiveness.. finding the harmony within my relationships to these words, then moving to the notes of that music.

I commit my self to being firm, flexible, and discerning when looking at how to walk this line where self forgiveness supports and enables me to act in and as what I see is best versus being passive, accepting, limp, and returning to old problems repetitively without any recourse I am satisfied by.